Is Consistency Good?

Reflection #17


1. A degree of density, firmness, viscosity, etc.: The liquid has the consistency of cream.

2. Steadfast adherence to the same principles, course, form, etc.: There is consistency in his pattern of behavior.

3. Agreement, harmony, or compatibility, especially correspondence or uniformity among the parts of a complex thing: consistency of colors throughout the house.

4. The condition of cohering or holding together and retaining form; solidity or firmness.

Consistency has become a new goal of mine. A new way of living. A new scheduled habit. A new desired characteristic.

Consistency has the ability to transform your life. Transform your mindset. Transform your elevation.

This past week, I have been enduring a modest version of the Bubonic Plague. Or so I like to call it, the cough that won’t ever leave.

As many of you already know, my content is now on a set schedule. Tuesday, Livestream. Wednesday, Blog Post. Thursday, Podcast Episode. However, what happens when something comes up? What happens if you get ill or hurt? In my case, what happens when your sick?

Do you take a week off? Do you delay production? or do you still provide the content on it’s scheduled date?

I chose to still provide my content, a day late yes, but I still provided it.

We are all involved in personal or professional activities. We all have life commitments. However, when those commitments cross paths with unforeseen situations, why should our commitments be impacted if we may still be able to achieve them?

As years have passed, I’ve learned,  if you allow yourself to disappoint yourself then you may easily accept disappointments from other.

So, are  you okay with letting own self down? Granted things will not always turn out the way you’ve intended. But try. Try to not break the commitment because it does shape how we deal with situations within our lives.

………………..I want you to give some thought to that.

Consistency is a habit everyone should include within their daily lives. Consistency creates structure. Structure is needed in one form or another.

The purpose of this post is to give you that extra perspective and bring this issue to the forefront.

There will be days you are tired, not up for the task or just don’t want to do anything. So I ask you, are your goals important to you? Can your goals wait? Can your goals be delayed? Should your set goals face disappointments?

Optimistic Searchings is meant to open your mind, focus on self-care, heal open wounds and positively elevate your mindset. My posts may not make sense to all, but it will make sense to the person currently facing this situation. That is the purpose.

Thank you for reading, see you next week!





Leave a comment down below and let me know your thoughts! #OptimisticSearchings

NYC ValentiMes Day

Reflection #16

NYC Valentine’s Day- Side note: This is an Informal Blog

Also incorrectly pronounced ValentiMes day.


The misconception of what love actually is.


The misconception that love is equivalent to flowers, gifts and dinner for ONE day.


The misconception that the value of your Valentine’s Day equates to the value of your relationship or connection with your partner.


O’ man

This is one of the first times I’ve ever been single on Valentines Day. *Only the blog readers will know this juicy detail*

It’s never bothered me before and sure doesn’t now. I guess because of self-contentment.

Rather then coming straight home today from work, I decided to do something a little different. I decided to do a little walking around in Lower Manhattan to observe the Valentine’s Day poppingness.

My Observations:

  1. Duplicated Balloons
  2. Pricey Dinner Reservations
  3. Heavy and Light Flower Arrangements
  4. Love
  5. All red everything. Red was literally bleeding all over the city today. Red lipsticks, Red coats, Red dresses, Red Scarfs. I never realized how festive people were for just this ONE day.

Observing the above things made me curious. It made me want to look into the background of Valentine’s Day.

What it actually is and why are we celebrating with a bunch of chocolate covered strawberries?

So according to history, Valentine’s Day has no clear story. Below are some VDay Facts

  1. In the late 15th century, it replaced a Roman fertility festival.
  2. The holiday is actually centered around a man name Valentine, who was one of the most highly recognized saints for the Roman Catholic Church.
  3. In the 3rd century he officially became a Roman Catholic Priest.
  4. Emperor Claudius II, I’m assuming another important person, decided that single men made better soldiers so he outlawed marriage for young, unattached men.
  5. Valentine continued to perform marriages but in secret. When his side hustle was discovered, he was then executed. Crazy stuff!

Another story indicates that Valentine might have sent the very 1st valentine greeting card.

  1. Apparently when in prison he fell deeply in love with a girl who would visit often.
  2. Before his death, he apparently sent her a letter signed “from your Valentine,” an expression that has been carried down for years!
  3. So long story short, in 496, Pope Gelasius designated Feb. 14 to honor St. Valentine. The card trend quickly evolved and by the Middle Ages Valentine was one of the most popular saints in Europe. Lovers then started exchanging homemade cards as early as the 15th century, copying verses from books of valentine poems.

Sorry if that seemed all over the place, but you get the point. I hope you learned atleast one thing from the listed above.

So how many of you guys knew A version already ?

It’s important for us to know that today is actually meant to celebrate love. Not the flowers, not the gifts, not the fasade that you are loved or that someone is thinking of you etc etc etc. Today is about celebrating the life Valentine apparently sacrificed by performing underground marriage unions and believing in this drug we call love. O how I love love, but we will leave that for another blog.

As this day comes to an end, I want you all to just reflect. Whether you celebrated alone. Yes, that is a thing. Or celebrated with family. friends or your partner/s. Take time to just appreciate all the free love you receive daily. Although this love holiday is celebrated for exactly 24 hours, everyday be grateful for the love you currently have or have encountered.

Have a great rest of your Vdays!

Mamma is tired.

Night ya’ll

It’s Better to Not Expect, Then to Expect.

Reflection #15

It’s better to not expect, then to expect.

How many times have we set ourselves up freely for disappointments?

How many times have we been set up to disappoint?

It’s a reoccurring phenomenon we are all aware of. An uncontrollable habit or expectation we place.

I tend to have a hard time understanding disappointment. I used to interpret it ALL as intentional. I felt as though people were trying to disappoint me.

However, as the years have gone by I’ve been able to take the “me” out of the equation. I’ve been able to stop putting myself into everything and just observe and realize people have other things going on.

A little background on me. I grew up a little spoiled. Yes, I know, your shocked huh? *sarcasm*

I grew up with a single mother, raising 4 of us.

My two cousins, my sister and lil o’ me in Rochester, NY.

The youngest by 7 Years.

I was the baby and definitely was treated like it. Long story short, disappointment rarely came into my life. Or rarely was acknowledged. I was always able to live and care about my “little o’ world” selfishly. Maybe it was because I realized disappointment at an early stage of my life, but we won’t get into it today. Long story short, I acquired the habit of just choosing to become numb.

Now that I’ve realized disappointment can hit me everyday, there is a new perspective on it rather than ignoring its existence.

For one, Ive been able to grasp the concept of being disappointed. For two, I’ve been able to tie disappointment as an emotion. And for three, the reality that it may have not been intentional started becoming my initial thought.

Those are just the steps I take.

Disappointment is a hard topic to discuss because we are taught to suppress those emotions. We however are also taught to not place expectations. But when the two cross paths, which is the right component?

For me, I believe acknowledging your views on a disappointment, failed expectation, is key. But the way you react to it is actually the primary focus. With my evolution in self-development I’ve been able to learn that disappointment will always be there but sometimes things we desire are not what we need. Sometimes things are meant to just be taken at face value. When you stop placing expectations and just let things evolve the way it needs to naturally, you will realize nothing in life can be controlled.

There are two option: Either it’s meant for you or it’s not. So yes, you may be disappointed. And yes, you had expectations. And no, you’re not wrong for having expectations because it’s gives you a view on your desires. It shows you what you are willing to settle for and what you are not willing to settle for.

So if it’s either a relationship, job opportunity, self achievement , test score, weight goal, completed sale etc. Keep striving for what you desire. Acknowledge that disappointments happen and realize they are meant to be in your life sometimes to shape it. Also, never let disappointments stop your end goal because maybe the route you took just wasn’t the right one. If that’s the case, just get on a new path and continue towards the goal.

So in summary. Life happens but the way you react to it is key.

Disappoinments are meant to show you your desires.

Expectations are also meant to show you your desires.

Modify any failed attempts to help create your desired reality.

But realize, disappointments happen naturally. You cannot control what is meant to happen in your life, however you have a choice if you would like to ACCEPT it in your life.

Old Ways Won’t Open NEW doors

Reflection #14

Welcome to another Wednesday blog posting where we tap within and focus on self-development.

Old ways won’t open NEW doors.

Say it out loud now.

Doesn’t that just send shivers all over your body?

How many times do we wish for new things in our lives but don’t want to take the proper steps or do the necessary work to obtain it?

If you didn’t say a lot, I’ll say a lot for you.

It’s hard to change things about ourselves because of our desired goals. We subconsciously think we can reach things without having to change anything. Because who ideally wants to change?

It’s only when our goals and our lifestyles happen to cross paths that we then force ourselves to further develop and “choose”.

Progression is a key component if you are trying to obtain a lifestyle you’ve never lived before. Most of us, I won’t say all, are striving for the unknown territory. Territory we dream about. Territory we feel in our hearts. “Our Desired Life Outcome” I’ll call it.

In order to reach this territory a lot of work will need to be put in. A lot of opening and closing doors.

You have to be willing to push yourself outside your comfort zone to get to that “Desired Life Outcome”. Try new things. Try odd things. Learn about the true you and do not care how you may be portrayed.

Force yourself into an unknown territory to learn again and possibly fail. It’s okay to fail. It’s wonderful to fail. Failing means you were willing to take risks.

Being okay with consistency means you are scared of risks and possible rejection. You therefore would be too scared to learn about your own weaknesses. The only way to truly succeed is to uncover those weaknesses and try until you conquer the hurdles.

As I push myself to open a new door, I’m pushing my readers to do the same. Take a step into a new journey, a journey of Optimistic Searchings.

Define Who?

Reflection #13

Define who?

Who are we to define how an individual should look or how it technically looks to be healthy?

A topic that has been debated for years, has surfaced again in a new light.

I saw a picture yesterday on Essence’s Instagram that made me feel remarkably happy and inspired. A women, who seemed to be hiking in MachuPicchu, was rocking her athletic gear and letting the world know she made it and was there to conquer. Or at least that’s what I was thinking in my head.

Before I continue rambling, here is the photo below;

Isn’t it dope? I love how this photo makes her seem very knowledgeable about her physical strength, but with confidence. Back to the forefront of the topic, why are images like this never shown in athletic campaigns or as a health image? To me it seems that she is very fit with her abs in formation like Beyoncé and her arms looking stronger than the Rock Johnson’s.

This picture is just so powerful.

In yesterday’s Facebook live stream I discussed how setting your own path on how to live is important. No one is you. No one can be you. No one can declare who you are. There is nothing wrong  with following helpful guides and tips on how to be healthier and in better shape for yourself. However, in the end of the day you will need to decide on what is the end goal that makes you feel the best. What in the end makes you feel happy. What in the end makes you feel the most confident.

Make yourself a priority. At the end of the day, you’re your longest commitment.

Stand by that.

Learn about yourself.

Love yourself.

Challenge yourself.

Be one with yourself.

But most of all, be accepting of yourself.


Mind Grasp

Reflection #12

Mind Grasp

It’s been quite sometime huh?

I guess I’ve pushed back this day hoping I had more control over my current state.

Since we’ve last spoken I’ve progressed positively emotionally, mentally and spiritually to a state I desired to obtain.

Mind Grasp.

Grasping of the Mind.

Continuously a hard thing to wrap our hands around because our mind is continuously evolving. Our perspectives and bias opinions are always changing to the point we don’t even know ourselves on a daily basis. But changing in a good way. Closer to our destiny mentally.

We learn New things.

Center around Different Environments.

We Evolve.

Within the past two years I’ve been able to logically think things through rather than jump the gun on an initial thought. This is a major accomplishment because this used to hold me back from a lot of social experiences. Trying to obtain a healthy control over the mind is a necessity. It gets you through your emotions and pushes you closer to who you need to be in this world.

I used to hate people and now I run a business for people.

Face to Face, Verbal to Verbal, Message to Message contact.

Who would have thought.

However, now that I’m getting close to grasping my purpose in life due to what my mind graviates too, life has become so much easier. Once you realize who you actually are becoming, your grip starts to release.


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Justice System + All Lives Matter = Unity

Reflection # 10

Justice System + All Lives Matter = Unity

This post might seem irrelevant to my other content but it’s something that needs to be said.

As people, we tend to filter out our actions between our own thought processes. We tend to take the easier route out of things, rather than support our initial beliefs.

Another man was killed today by our wonderful “justice system”. Like a piece of meat, right out in the open with no care for the life or soul it once lived. This issue continuously is  getting out of hand. Resulting in the justice system being injustice because of the hundreds of deaths occurring every couple of months.

I cannot wrap my head around this.

How is this legal?

This issue is past the point of white vs. black.

The real issue is there seems to be an “entitled group” allowed to dominate our lives with no repercussions. People should not get killed by cops, found neither guilty or innocent.

I’m a firm supporter against gun violence and trafficking.

AMERICA is not the land of freedom, it’s the land for freedom to die and be oppressed.

How can anyone be safe in this country? Who is actually protected? In my opinion,  police are just another example of gang voilence that cannot be categorized.

As a Summary:

Murdering innocent men based on profiling seems to be okay in this country.

Increased homicides due to “misjudgment” seems to be okay in this country.





This needs to stop.